One interesting tutorial I attend today or can I say now?

I'm blogging this when the tutorial is still on but I think I should share this with all of you who are reading this.

As a public relation practitioner, I find this topic quite engaging and sensible.

The case study I'm dealing now talks about how communication can be important in dealing with subordinate/clients/friends/relatives or even strangers.

What makes a good communicator is all about style, substance, and knowing the needs of the people whom we are speaking to.

What Barack Obama lack of with the mission in Libya is a clear message.

He didn't really define and convey clearly to the American people of the army purpose and mission in Libya.

This perception has led to some comparison to him and previous President's communication skills. One of the most discussed ex-President is former President Ronald Reagan.

Ronald Reagan was known to many people as the "Great Communicator". His style of communicating, which included coming across as sincere and his capability to talk about an issues in a simple way as he can without being simplistic. Probably because his previous profession as an actor??

"Hollywood taught Reagan to speak; General Electric taught Reagan to listen.", said Marlon Brando.

Another example would be Warren Buffet, the world third wealthiest investors. The key to his success is his constant reading and he remembers everything he reads, thus people say he is an excellent listener.

So I assume that in order to be a great communicators, one first needs to be a good listener.

It is an art, it takes time, patience and putting aside one's agenda. Cause full concentration is needed to be a good listener.

So don't put hopes or give fake concentration cause it makes thing even worst. Its either full concentration or don't even bother listening.

Listening is important in strengthen bonds, friendships, and to nurture healthy relationships. we often feel a closer bonds with someone when we takes time to know the other's experience, thoughts, feelings and desires.

To improve listening skills, there are several habits that need to be avoided. What they are depends on the communication style; the styles varies from person to person.

Firstly, there the Reassurer, who is an optimistic and positive, the one who always tell you that things gonna turn out well although it doesn't seems to be. It seems to be a good thing to be optimistic but they doesn't know they are sidelining a person's pain / situation and it raises doubts on whether they are truly interested in talking about the issues. Disappointment and pain of life often been avoided by this listener.

Secondly comes, Advice Giver. the one who always wanting to solve your problems. Mostly Men I guess? tend to be the advice givers, whereas women want to talk. Person with this habits may think that they know the best advice and what's best for a person, and somehow seems to be controlling.

Thirdly would be a person who intellectualises or spiritualises what we say, theIntellectualiser rationalises. they seems to be interested in what is logical and reasonable only. Their comments is often good to hear but feels empty because their comments comes from MINDS and not MINDS and HEARTS.

Forth would be, the Interrupter, a listener who cannot keep silent when one is talking. Often bombards comments on one's thoughts and asks too many questions before one has an opportunity to complete speaking. No offence but they mean well, but the habits can leave the speaker feels that speaking to this listener is pointless..

Finally would be, a listener who goes off tangents and basically ends a conversation. All of us might have experienced listeners who thought their stories about children, grandchildrens or a recent surgery might be more interesting than the story they are being told. And when this happens, we often felt robbed by the listener. Thus the opportunity to share had been taken away. People tend to avoid these sorts of listeners. Why? Cause they are too self-involved and have no fun.

So if we are honest with ourselves, all of us are guilty of atleast one of the habits above right? Still we cannot be too hard on ourselves. Probably most of us had little training to listen. We're much proficient in sending message than receiving them. But, with practice and and awareness of our bad listening habits, we too, can be a good listener.

Have faith in yourself.